Last night I told my husband something that’s been eating at me:
“I’m sick of being the most interesting person in the room.”
Sounds arrogant as hell, right? Let me explain. I’m in Vegas for 3 months- to give birth to baby #3! Due this week! (FINALLY!) Five weekends in a row, we hung out with what my Millionaire friends call “Normies.” The conversations with Normies? Backstreet Boys concerts. Complaining about kids. Bitching about inflation and blaming the government. I can’t talk business… or personal growth. I can’t discuss the $20K coaching programs I wanna join (yes, while 9 months pregnant and due any day). I can’t share that I’m building AI automations into my business so it runs without me for a year. They’d think I’m crazy. Or showing off. Or both. So I sit there, nodding along to conversations about… nothing that matters. And I realized: This is the price of growth.
When you start thinking bigger, making more money, and taking risks that terrify your friends, you outgrow your environment.
And it’s lonely as hell. But here’s what I’ve learned: You have two choices.
Choice 1: Shrink back down to fit in
Stay comfortable. Keep the same friends. Have the same conversations. Make the same money. Die with the same dreams you have right now.
Choice 2: Pay for your new peer group
This is why I spend $200K on coaching programs. Not just for the strategies (though they’re gold). For the people. When I’m in Thailand with my entrepreneur friends, we talk about building 8-figure businesses. How to scale without burning out. Which investments are printing money. These conversations fill me up instead of draining me.
The hard truth about upgrading your life:
Your current friends might not come with you. And that’s okay. You don’t have to choose between your old life and your new one. You can have both. But you do have to choose between staying comfortable and growing uncomfortable.
Here’s what this means for you:
If you’re the smartest person in your friend group about money, you need a new friend group. If your family thinks your financial goals are “unrealistic,” you need people who think they’re too small. If your coworkers think you’re “crazy” for wanting more, you need to be around people who think you’re not thinking big enough. You can’t become a millionaire while surrounded by people who think like broke people.
How to find your new peer group:
- Pay for it. Join masterminds, coaching programs, conferences. Rich people pay to be around other rich people.
- Go where they are. Not at happy hour complaining about work. At investment meetups, business conferences, high-end gyms.
- Become interesting enough that they want to be around you. Start building something worth talking about.
The loneliness is temporary. The growth is permanent.
And eventually, you’ll find your tribe of people who think as big as you do. Until then? Get comfortable being uncomfortable. It’s the price of admission to the life you actually want. Unconventionally Yours, Sam P.S. If you’re reading this thinking “I wish I had friends who talked about building wealth,” you do. You just haven’t met them yet. Start by becoming the person they’d want to be friends with.